I am Looking For Me

I searched myself,

https://www.flickr.com/photos/9933300@N02/5803068620

on Google.

Three times in an hour, not sure
what I was looking for.

Bored.

Clueless, for sure.

I saw my name popped up,

I saw me, my picture, news, accolades, data, information, Google, Bing.

Do people have time to read all this?

Do I exist outside of these pages?
Am i defined by these info layers?

Neon-lighted, layered, e-pages that no one cares for?

Does it matter?

I scrolled and scrolled down the pages,

So many identities, names, profiles.

Lying their unnoticed and unrecognized.

Lifeless lives, electronically dead, decaying encryption, digital IDs.

I searched myself, again, hoping to find something new, although,

I know.

Nothing has changed in an hour.

The cycle continues, and even-though I know

there is nothing new to look for. 
Yet.

I searched myself, one more time.

Is it to confirm that I am still alive? Or

To ensure my existence?
Is it because I don't know what else to do? Or
I cannot decide what i should do?

Google does not have answer to my questions.

Am I trapped with-in a powerful data center?

Am I becoming a series of codes?

Who knows?

One last time,

I searched myself.

To know I am alive.

To know, I am still being upgraded.

I could see a new update patch coming,

to add info on my profile page.

The new info was

the date of my digital death

Now, I know

what I was searching for

I was searching for me, myself.
Searching for that cannot be found on a page.

I was searching my soul.